Stupid Mayoral Bets

The only dumber than Stupid Pet Tricks is Stupid Mayor Bets. You know the drill. Two sports teams — say Cincinnati and Cleveland (or Tisdale and Toronto Toledo) — meet in a post-season sports event [oops, have to take Toronto out here, no post-season possible for that city], and the two mayors hold a press conference uncomfortably wearing their city’s team jersey and wager on the winner, cleverly risking the product their particular city is known for.

If any of these mayors actually were sports fans, or even know more than the minimum of the team in question, it might be amusing. Now, it’s just a cliche, uncomfortable mayors in shiny jerseys they never paid for and wagering items the taxpayers will pay for, not them.

Please, bring on the dancing dobermans or manic monkeys. Enough of stupid mayors. Isn’t having to put up with Rob Ford enough?

English speaking toys illegal in Canada

Toys ‘R’ Us in Quebec refuses to sell English-only Daniel Tiger doll
Montreal father says it should be up to parents, not province, to determine the toys kids play with
By Kate McKenna, CBC News Posted: Apr 13, 2015 6:02 PM ET Last Updated: Apr 14, 2015 11:34 AM ET

Nick Messina of Montreal says rules should be changed after a clerk refused to sell him an English-speaking Daniel Tiger toy for his daughter, Carina.
Nick Messina of Montreal says rules should be changed after a clerk refused to sell him an English-speaking Daniel Tiger toy for his daughter, Carina. (CBC)

A Montreal man is criticizing Quebec language laws after a clerk at a local Toys “R” Us told him he was wasn’t allowed to purchase a talking plush toy for his daughter because it only speaks and sings in English.

Nick Messina tried to purchase the Daniel Tiger toy for his one-year-old daughter, Carina, after noticing her eyes “lit up” while watching the popular children’s TV show Daniel Tiger’s Neighbourhood.

Hoping to buy it as an Easter gift, he drove to his nearest Toys “R” Us, but it wasn’t in stock.

He called another Toys “R” Us in Montreal, and was informed by the clerk that two of the toys were in stock, but that Messina couldn’t buy it because it was unilingual.

Daniel Tiger talks and sings 14 different phrases — all in English.

Messina said the clerk thanked him for letting them know the toy only spoke English, and said it would be shipped back to Ontario.

“I kind of felt a little bit turned off. I felt it was discriminatory against the English-speaking community in Montreal. After all, Montreal is multi-ethnic, multicultural,” he said.

Not giving up, the father tried to purchase the doll online — only to discover the Toys “R” Us website wouldn’t ship the product to Quebec.

English-speaking toys illegal

Messina didn’t know until a few weeks ago, but because of Quebec’s language laws, it’s illegal to sell a unilingual toy unless it has a French-speaking counterpart.

He says it should be up to parents — not the province — to determine the toys they can buy for their kids.

“I don’t understand why, when it comes to the choice of purchasing a toy for our children, that we have to be subjected to these kinds of rules and regulations,” he said.

“It’s kind of saddening.”

Toys ‘R’ Us admits mistake

In a statement to CBC News, a spokeswoman from Toys “R” Us apologized for the inconvenience, but said the toy shouldn’t have been on the shelves.

“Toys ‘R’ Us shipped in error the English-speaking product to one of our Quebec stores and a customer tried to purchase it. Our store did not sell the product to the customer and we apologized for the inconvenience that this caused our customer. We immediately communicated to our store that this product cannot be sold,” said the statement.

Messina’s perseverance paid off.

He managed to buy the doll eventually, on Amazon, for about $50 more than the Toys “R” Us price.

Though it was more than her dad had planned to pay for the doll, Carina adores her new toy.

Kermit the Frog working illegally in USA…to be deported


In a shocking development, a joint party led by Birthers and Tea Party researchers have discovered that not only was Kermit not born in the US, he is indigenous to Costa Rica.

Rand Cruzio, a spokesman for the research group, said, “What do you expect from someone who hangs out with damn hippies. Long haired, bearded, sticking his hands up people asses all day. If he were alive, Jim Henson would be next on our list.

Turn the damn frog over and you can even see the bloodline where he has been sticking his fingers up Kermit ass.


Miss Piggy could not be reached for comment. A spokesman from the State Department confirmed she has recently applied for a passport and unconfirmed UPS whistle blowers state they recently delivered a packager from her to the Costa Rican Embassy.

Looked like a damn visa application to me, said a UPS driver on condition of anonymity. Good riddance, as far as I am concerned. Even is she is Murrican, we do not take with thems that hang out with furryners.

Canada’s Smartest Person is a football player

Ya gotta love it….

The Maclean’s Genius explains how he solved the Singapore puzzle
That brain teaser about Cheryl’s birthday that’s stumping everyone? Peter Dyakowski solved it in the gym. Here’s how.

Adrian Lee
April 14, 2015

Ti-Cat’s Peter Dyakowski gets the crowd going during fourth quarter CFL Eastern-Semi final action between the Montreal Alouettes and the Hamilton Tiger Cats, in Guelph, Saturday, Nov. 2013. (Dave Chidley/CFL/CP)
The Ti-Cats’ Peter Dyakowski gets the crowd going during fourth-quarter CFL Eastern semi-final action between the Montreal Alouettes and the Hamilton Tiger-Cats in Guelph, Ont., in November 2013 (Dave Chidley/CFL/CP)

Well, we don’t call him our Genius for nothing. Peter Dyakowski, who bested the field in CBC’s Canada’s Smartest Person contest in 2012, and whom you can challenge every week to our Maclean’s Quiz—be warned, he sets the bar very high—took a crack at the mind-boggling math question tweeted by Singapore media personality Kenneth Kong: When is Cheryl’s birthday?

With help from his friends in the Hamilton TiCats organization—yes, he is also a lineman in the Canadian Football League—Dyakowski breaks down how he figured out this puzzle (while at the gym, no less). Watch the video below as puzzles meet the pigskin: